Character Battles – Xenomorph vs The Thing

It is a wholly ridiculous concept, but who hasn’t pondered a hypothetical battle between two of their favourite movie stars, particularly when they possess similar personalities and attributes. We have already had Freddy vs Jason and Alien vs Predator, and while those movies sucked beyond comprehension, it didn’t stop us from flocking to the movies in our legions . . .

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Howling II: Stirba – Werewolf Bitch (1985)

Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf is as ridiculous as it sounds, but not half as bad as people tend to make out.

Okay, it is wholly ridiculous: a heady blend of MTV pop music videos, New Wave eroticism and classic Hammer Horror, but unlike hundreds of other efforts floating around in the ‘bad movie’ afterlife, you’ll be hard pressed to call it boring. In fact, it is positively spellbinding in its presentation, a movie with eschews logicality in favour of a visceral experience of shallow exhibitionism…

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The Curse (1987)

It never quite happened for Will Wheaton, did it?

After shooting to fame in the early 80s with cult movies The Last Starfighter (1984) and Stand by Me (1985), the sky certainly seemed to be the limit for the gangly little cherub who will forever be known as Gordy Lachance, but in spite of a decent run as Wesley Crusher in cult series Star Trek: The Next Generation, his career would prove spotty at best…

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Uninvited (1988)

In the history of cinema, Creature Features are as old as time.

Looking back, we’ve had some pretty intimidating screen monsters throughout the years, icons such as Godzilla and King Kong, the kind of monumental beasts who savaged entire cities, and who even showed themselves capable of emotional depth, resulting in some of film’s most interesting and influential instances of catharsis…

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Video Nasties # 1: Absurd (1981)

Back in the early 1980’s, the UK press had a field day damning the content of video cassette tapes dubbed ‘Video Nasties’. These releases went under the radar of the British Board of Film Classification due to a loophole in distributing laws, and many decried their explicit content, relating them to various real-life crimes and claiming that their influence was responsible for warping the minds of the youth of society…

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Breeders (1986)

Breeders is like one of those old monster movies with a giant erection.

Another in a long line of exploitation flicks given the bluray treatment, it is the story of a giant fly who sets about raping a cast of airheaded delectables with the intention of expanding its species. Able to take the form of any human it comes into contact with, it seeks out virgin victims and impregnates them with a black, gooey substance, while using acid to burn them for reasons which are never quite explained…

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